The Calm Before The Storm

I had a challenging life growing up and I am used to everyday struggle. So whenever it’s calm and smooth sailing in all aspects of my life I become anxious, grateful but anxious. I brace myself because I feel like it’s the calm before the storm.

I recently opened a store, it’s not really doing great but it’s good enough that it can operate on it’s own. My family are healthy and it seems like everything is great. Then one fine afternoon, I received a message saying my little brother was brought to the hospital and was admitted because of below normal heartbeat and chest pain. My husband’s promotion was put on hold because of reasons that we don’t know. Suddenly, there was chaos because of health, finances, time, people, schedule and every little thing that matters.

Sitting now, praying, I can’t help but still thank God for everything. I thank Him for all the wonderdul things good and bad. Now that the storm has come, I look forward to all the great things that’s coming after. I believe that there is a calm before the storm but behind those dark clouds, the sun is still shining and there will always be rainbow after all the rains.

Maybe it’s a law of attraction as others will call it, that what you will think and feel is what will happen. But for me, it is just how the way life is. The circle of life.

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An anniversary prayer

Dear Lord, as I am about to go to sleep tonight. I want to say thank you for blessing our life. Thank you for this life we share with your love. Thank you for the happy and good memories that we have and the laughters too. I know we will have more if you will it too. Thank you also for the times when it’s difficult to choose to love each other. These are the times that we know how strong our love and how much more it can become stronger. Thank you Lord for our differences because through it all, we learn to understand, be patient and more compassionate with each other. We learn that most of the time we need to compromise and always choose to love even when the going gets rough. Thank you Lord for our stubbornness, with it we never give up on each other. Thank you also Lord for our son, for he is a living symbol of our love. Thank you Lord for everything. I pray for many years of bumpy but happy journey of our marriage life. Amen ©stuzzyjen 10312018

I love you

I love you even when you’re busy

I love you even when you’re tired

I love you even when you doze off while talking to me

I love you even when you snore so loud

I love you even when your hand is so heavy when you hug me while you sleep

I love you because you do what you do for us

I love you because you love me

I love you and I am always grateful

I love you because you are my gift from God.

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Leave the past where it belongs… behind you

The past…There are so many things in our past… But some of them need not to be in our present nor our future. 

To discover the details of the past is so tempting… Almost unbearable… Knowing that there are so many things that we don’t know, we thirst to know and unveil it. 

But then we stop and think… Does it really matter? Will it make our present and future much better than they are today? Or are the things that we will discover in the past will only destroy our peace of mind? Are we willing to risk so much of our present just to know a bit of the past that we can never change? 

Every Saint has a past and every sinner has a future. Learn from the past and make a better future. Let it go… Leave the past where it belongs… Behind you.

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My One True Love

You smiled at me
And held my hands
When you said your name
I knew then you’ve got my heart

My world became brighter
As you bring laughter each day
My heart grew bigger
As you fill it with love everyday

You are my angel my one true love
You are the light, God sent to my life
You brought color to my world
That very day when you gave your heart to me.
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Those who really love you

I don’t like straightforward people. I don’t like them because their words are always painful. They always hit on target, they never miss. Their comments are often unacceptable. They make me see and hear things I don’t want to hear and see.  Things I keep on denying and truths I never wanted to hear.

Then just today I realized that all these time, I am sorrounded with those kind of people, frank, honest and at times tactless. And I don’t like them.

As I ponder on these things, I can’t help but feel so loved and blessed because I realized that I am sorrounded with people who really loves me and cares so much for me. Still, I don’t like them, I don’t need to.

Right now, as I lay down in bed I thank God for them. I am grateful for these people because they always wants to see not only a better version of me but the best version that I can be. I don’t like them, I don’t have to.

As I close my eyes I smile with gratefulness, because I know that even if I don’t like them, I love them with all my heart.

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God knows

I was at the point in my life that I don’t know what I want, what I feel, what I want to do and where I am going. I was so lost. I asked God to show me the way. I asked Him to lead and i’ll follow His direction.

I learned to entrust to Him all of me because I know that only Him knows what is best for me. I let the flow of life take me to where I am today.

I will never say I made a wrong choice, because I know that everything is a blessing that comes with a lesson learned.
Every decisions I made along the way made me who I am and have brought all that I have today including the man I love.